my biggest mistake.... n i'm realiy2 regret it

manusia adalah insan.. insan yg tidak pernah sunyi daripada melakukan kesilapan.. tetapi kadangkala kesilapan itu kadangkala akan membuat seseorang itu kehilangan sesuatu yg amat penting dalam hidup :'( dan menyesal sgt2 apabila seseorang itu melakukan kesilapan, spatutnya seseorang itu mangambil kesilapan itu sbg satu pengajaran,tp when kesilapan itu dilakukan berulang2 kali.. seseorg itu dipanggil losser, just like me:'( so when u have someone important plis takecare her,plis appreciate those people that know how to appreciate u before they all gone forever..learn to understand and learn how to get rid the dark past, people will come and go,but in our life but findinn someone like her is hard to find :'(

zul ada mnegenali seseorg recently, at begininn she's only ordinary fwen, but for the time being we become closer,and become close friend's, we share everything together, problem, talk together, she's care about me,always thare for u whatever i'm sad,happy, and she's the one shinnin my life with full of happy moment together,and make me forget the past..after all problem with my past, my father, and after beinn alone and make me so sad,miserable and so on, suddently she come and make me happy and smile always we share all the moment together with joy and smile..sigh... she's the one dont want to let me alone and give her best to avoid that,and she's the one wipe out all my tear and sadness i'm miss that moment so much, i'm know but suddently she's become bz with assg and so on... so she become bz n not like before.. but what so stupid about me i'm start to thinkinn about my past, i'm afraid to become annoyinn person because i'm do it at all xgf me and they all dump me when i'm try my best to get in touch of our relationship. so what i do is get rid all of connection between us,but inside of my heart i'm realiy2 regret it.. what hv i done? y me make this stupid decision,why i'm do to our relationship? i'm suppose to support her give advise, moral support n so on,when she's hav problem, not add more problem to her. :'( . it's the same way i do to the girl who try to approachinn me,past 2 year but they all no close like me wit her. What i'm done? sory because beinnn selfish,what i'm do is to run away from the problem, why i'm cannot be seorang yg tabah and face the problem directly wit the with sound mind? but i'm also can't understand what inside me, why me become like this?why i'm become fobia? maybe i'm have no budy to speak, the real close friend, because before when i'm talk to my friend's they turn me down, laughinnn at me,make me laughinn stock for many years and when i'm go back home, my father always get angry to me, i'm tired!!! i'm tired of everyting!!!!!!!

so what i do is make me close to the most creater, create us with full of love and inteligent, only HIS know what the best to us,in the middle of the night i'm mengadu dan berdoa kepadaNYA i'm always pray for her,for her happyness and want her to be happy not like when she's beside me, i'm know, she always sad becos me,because when the people say anythinnn bad and not true about me,about her, i'm as her close friends before always want her to be happy always and i'm will become like this and not hurt anyone anymore, FOREVER