Sunday, September 27, 2009

ayahku.....

zul ceritakn nih utk pengajaran sme,zul minta tidak dikutuk ayah zul, zul syg die, tp cara die wt zul sedih, wt zul rasa fobia sgt2.. zul sebenarnya tidak mempunyai adik beradik, zul sorg sorg je.. ayah zul nih seorang yg sgt2 garang tegas,n mesti mengikut ckp die WAJIB. zul tau n die nk zul jadi yg terbaik,zul lah harapan die, everythinn must be perfect to his eye. but, the way his say and do to me make me feel so lonely,miserable,sad,i'm feel i'm the son his don't want,i'm not perfect as his want...sigh

dulu masa zul kecik2 die belikan zul komputer n die nk zul learn how to use that computer, but when his find me use that computer, his become angry and say somethin not right to say to children, b***, many time his always become angry to me,die slalu tengking2 zul, marah2 zul, pukul2 zul kadang2 atas sebab2 yg tkboleh diterima like keluar bermain ngn sedara n zul akan dipukul smpi lebam2 n berbekas2,

until now, he's still with that atitude, when i come back home,he want me to read, study..always he dont give me to watching television, to sleep, even to watching cartoon, he's become angry....when he do all that, zul not become what he want but pay back what he not give me to do,to another stupid thinn like driving fast,criyinn... become fobia and all sort of thing and i'm always bergaduh with my father zul dah penat sgt2, n what i do is berkurung dalam bilik sorang2, and when i'm alone i'm always thing the dark past, i'm tired, penat sgt, he's the man make zul become worse person, and i have nobody to speak,share and suppot me and i become worse,worse and worse

2 comments:

hamizah.othman said...

hermm...to be honest I was the one that involved in this situation unofficially..Don't wanna blame anyone but the thing is that, don't have to keep on remembering every single thing in da past..let bygone b bygone and that the best way bro..actually u think on different angles with ur father n that creates conflict between both of u..hermmm one more,actually I have various reasons for every single situation u did mentioned above..I know u better for such a long time n have my or actually "our" own point of view..huh..by da way, u still his son and u have to solve this prob. try to communicate with him n speak out the what makes the gap become deeper..this not the best way to settle on..

Ct J said...

erm...kt stuju dgn kwn zul nie....berbicg adlh baik untuk slesaikn maslh...cuba utk slesaikn maslh tp jgn cube utk lari dlm mslh...klu zul, dgn ayah..kt dgn akak berlainan mak...tp sume tu perkara lepas, tiada guna utk dkenang...yg pntg skg, zul pndg ke hadapn dn jg sskali toleh ke blkg...jika zul ingn menolenye juga, toleh lah hnya sbgai kngan...tp bkn smpadan....erm...apa2 pon, stiap ayah mhupon ibu, ingnkn yg terbaik tuk ank mereka..tmbhn pula zul ank tunggal...beljarlah rajin2 dn buktiknlah pd mreka yg zul blh brjaya....ok? jgn sedih2 ye...ape2 po, luahan rasa adlh bagus dr dipendam..jd critalah pd org yg zul percaya.....

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